Trying.

I have come to the realization that the problem I'm having is that I see certain things she does that I do, but these attributes are what I got from my evil mother... I constantly fight the urge to lash out and be mean, devious, lying. I try to be a good person because I want to be a better person than my family taught me is normal. If normal is lying, cheating, anger, abuse, and mental torture- I refuse to be normal! So here I am fighting these things and then my kid Is not just embracing the dark side, she's calling out to it! How can a sane person just sit and watch another destroy in every way she can, your life? Surely, I am not that person. I realize I may, one day, have this diary blog read by the individual I'm referencing time and time again. And that is okay. I say what I mean and I mean what I say. I live, breathe, and have enclaved myself with honesty. It is all I have. So the only thing I say to this person is; hear me now if you never listened before... How you have lived is how you have chosen to mold your existence, and we (your family) have instilled every moral and ethic we have developed in ourselves through taking the high road, which is the only path you should take. I have loved you without a shred of expecting any change in your behavior. Because I do love you. I will always love you. My baby is my baby but I love the baby I had. I guard against the monster that hurts me. You always remember that. You will not win.